Small acts of kindness

Sometimes bad things happen to good people. It can be just bad luck, like cancer, or unfortunately it can be more intentional. But people are basically good. Aren't they? I think that's the best assumption to carry through life because the moment your default expectation becomes negative then probably you will get to see people doing bad things. Of course, bad things happen every day and we hear all about them because they make the news. It's as if we have some off-kilter need to be shocked, to learn just how evil, mean and inhumane our fellow humans can be and this is bred and fed by the media. Instant news, fake news, on TV, in the papers, on the car radio, via the phones in our pockets, there's no getting away from it. It's no wonder we expect the worst of people. Or maybe it's just easier to expect the worst so we don't get disappointed? But if we stop and think about it, how often do we actually experience or witness these horrible things personally? Almost never thankfully, because most of us don't live in a war-torn country, don't live in fear, aren't persecuted or incarcerated. I don't know who reads this blog so maybe there are some of you who do suffer at the hands of others, physically, emotionally or psychologically, maybe in isolation, living with the effects and trying to carry on as normal. I am truly sorry if that is the case. 

So, it's important to be reminded of people doing good things, being kind, putting others before themselves. These things might not make the news but they make life worth living because what are we if we are not a positive force for good, part of the human race, contributing to our local and global community? There are ordinary people doing extraordinary things everywhere every day and to soak up these acts of kindness, read stories that make us smile and give credit where it's due (but not asked for) reconnects us with the natural balance.

As many of you will know we were victims of a hate crime a couple of nights ago. 'Hate crime' sounds a little strong but let me tell the story...
Here in our peaceful, glorious corner of the world on Exmoor there is a festival of world music, art, food, literature & theatre which runs from May Day to Midsummer every year. As part of this festival the village is adorned with flags thanks to a world expert in flags, 

Robin Ashburner, who lives locally and has been involved with this event from the outset over 5 years ago. There are flags from all over the world, randomly chosen to brighten up the valley and welcome the world to Simonsbath. Many people request specific flags for their own garden fences, perhaps a country where they once lived, somewhere their relatives live or just a favourite holiday destination! Last year a baby was born at this time and we all knew it was a girl because a pink flag appeared!! All these alongside every flag from the countries of Great Britain. For instance this year on our fence we have the state flag of Minnesota (where Nick worked at Camp Kamaji and where we had the trip of a lifetime canoeing in the Boundary Waters) next to a Polish flag because Nick's father was Polish. Until yesterday we also had a rainbow 'pride' flag. We first put this flag up last year when, during the festival, a gay nightclub was bombed in Florida so we replaced one of our other flags in solidarity. Much like in 2015 when we added in Nepalese prayer flags to honour those killed in the earthquake on and around Everest. Last year the rainbow flag was vandalised - someone climbed over our stone wall, cut through the cable ties fixing the pole to our fence, cut the flag off the pole and took it away, leaving the pole lying forlornly behind the hedge (with an inch of tattered cloth clinging on with pride!). This was incredibly upsetting but we replaced the flag and it flew there for the rest of the summer, undisturbed except by the wind. We even wondered whether it had been more of a prank as there were a lot of young walkers around that weekend on a camping trip and we naively thought maybe they just wanted the flag for themselves....until this weekend when the exact same thing happened. (So apologies for suspecting those innocent walkers!) 

We also found out yesterday that the police have been investigating other hate crimes in this area for the last two years, specifically repeated incidents of anti-semitic graffiti in the public toilets here in Simonsbath, and also in Winsford, about 10 miles away. 
When we discovered our missing flag yesterday morning it felt like such a personal attack that my first thought was that I didn't want to live here anymore, knowing that such an act of narrow-minded hatred could happen on our doorstep, in our bloody garden!! But that feeling quickly passed, for two reasons: firstly, if this could happen (and I know it's not a major thing, we weren't physically harmed, no bombs went off, no one died), if this could happen beneath the beech trees where we watch and listen to owls, where roe deer cautiously cross the road from one wooded hillside to another and where hooves are heard on the road almost as often as cars then it could happen anywhere. And secondly, thanks to endless messages of support from friends near and far we were quickly reminded that these mindless idiots, clearly more intimidated by us than we are by them, are very much in the minority, here and everywhere else. We were bombarded by words of love, offers to fly rainbow flags to send out a message, suggestions of how to prevent this happening again or how to catch those responsible, offers of hidden night-vision cameras, anti-vandal paint and even an offer to sit and watch and wait...

Whether it was a personal attack on us or just a statement of general intolerance and fear we'll probably never know but either way it has failed in its attempt to....I'm stuck, what were they attempting to do? Anyway, they've failed because Robin called us yesterday to say he had a replacement flag for us and this morning we cycled the 5 miles to his house to collect it, discovering that it's nearly twice as big as the last one!! 
This whole thing also made us really take note of positive stories (social media does have an upside!) such as a couple on their honeymoon in Scotland who left their car, with 'Just Married' scrawled on the bumper to go and swim in the Fairy Pools on Skye, returning to find £10 tucked under the windscreen wiper with a note of congratulations and a suggestion for the best local pub to get themselves a drink! It's not humanitarian work in Syria, it's just simple kindness, on a whim and yet it's wonderful isn't it? And so easy to do!

Gandhi said "You must be the change you wish to see in the world". 

A rainbow palette moodboard a gift from Ali

Ever since Nick has been unwell we have received nothing but kindness; regular contact from those dear to us, little thoughtful gifts (like the book that arrived this week from a mystery sender!), listening ears, flying visits, shoulders to cry on, donations to our Lymphoma running fund, love in abundance. 
So much so that we had maybe forgotten that people do bad things. So perhaps we should thank these small-minded vandals, who clearly live in fear, for reminding us that there is cruelty, meanness and hate in the world because that has only served to bring into sharper focus the fact that love always wins, good people just keep pulling out the stops in response to bad and so we will keep  flying the flag for love.

Oh, and by the way, the same day that we woke up to the missing flag we also woke up to the call of the cuckoo. I rest my case.